NOTES for Co1 7:25-40
Returning again to the theme of marriage and celibacy, Paul says directly that he has no unambiguous solution to this problem: he apparently did not receive a revelation from God that would allow him to give a definite answer, and therefore he has to limit himself to his own experience as a servant of Christ (v. 25). The apostle's personal experience, as is well known, was precisely the experience of celibacy, and this is what he shares with his readers. Reflecting on the path of celibacy, the apostle starts from what the Savior evidently had in mind when He spoke of the Kingdom of heaven that "has drawn near." It was obvious to Paul that we live in the very last times of which the great prophets of Israel spoke, and therefore he considers the ideal state for spiritual life to be one that would not bind a person in any way to the life of the still not fully transformed world and to its laws (vv. 29-35).
The apostle understands perfectly well what real family life is, and in a fallen world it is in any case bound up with everyday and household problems that could otherwise have been avoided. There is no sin in family life, but in our still not fully transformed world it can become a source not only of joy, but also of suffering, and Paul urges those who desire family life not to close their eyes to this obvious fact (v. 28). That is why the apostle proposes that each person remain in the family situation in which he finds himself (vv. 26-27). What matters to him is only that both marriage and celibacy be not an accident, but a conscious choice by the one who decides on one path or the other (vv. 36-40).
No one is obligated either to marriage or to celibacy if he does not feel a calling to one or the other. But once they decide on marriage, future spouses will at some point inevitably face the choice about which Paul speaks with complete clarity: whether to fulfill the will of God, "to please God," or to prefer their own comfort to it, "to please the husband" or "to please the wife." Apparently this is exactly what the apostle has in mind when he speaks of the sufferings inevitable in family life, if the matter concerns a Christian family: the choice of God's will in such a situation often entails discomfort at the very least. But while warning about difficulties, Paul still does not dissuade anyone from family life and does not try to predetermine anyone's choice: each person walks the path into the Kingdom himself, and only the one walking is free to choose a life companion on that path.