NOTES for Mat 19:1-15

Let us notice that the question about divorce is asked by the Pharisees, who were used to clarifying legal subtleties. But from the subtleties of interpreting the law, Jesus brings them back to the meaning of the creation of man and woman, to the God-given possibility of their unity, which surpasses human legal arrangements. At the same time Christ notes that Moses' ruling on divorce was dictated by human reasons. In doing so He Himself testified that among what tradition has preserved there are also human elements. But they do not cancel the fact that, at its foundation, Revelation was given to us from above. And now Jesus proclaims the indissolubility of marriage as the norm established from the beginning.

In our time it is hard to accept these words and even harder to fulfill them. Marriages fall apart easily and are not regarded as permanent unions; even for many who come into the Church, it is already too late to keep the commandment of one marriage. Perhaps the words whoever is able to accept this, let him accept it may serve as consolation. But a merciful attitude toward those who cannot fulfill the commandment with complete precision does not cancel what has been established as the norm that was meant to prevail in the world.

It is hard to understand why the disciples tried to keep children from coming to Christ. Perhaps they thought that only adults, people capable of understanding His words, dared come to the Teacher. But He can become close to every age.

Christ's call to let the children come to Him and not hinder them answers the question of when Christian upbringing and entry into the Church can begin. There is no need to wait for the age of conscious understanding; He loves us from the womb and can reveal Himself to us at any age.

"Can one divorce for any reason?" In other words, is there anything that binds a man and a woman when their feelings no longer draw them toward each other so strongly? What answers can be heard to this question? "Nothing binds them" (that is, one can divorce for any reason); "Mutual obligations bind them" (but how great is the value of a human word?); "Duty to society binds them" (but love can hardly be compared in value with civic duty...); "Children bind them" (yes, if they are taken into account).

Christ gives a different answer: a man and a woman are bound by the design for creation; that is, God Himself joins them. And He does this not through commandments and prohibitions on divorce, since law cannot generate love (something the Mosaic law wisely takes into account); He joins them by His presence in the relationship itself, acting by His wisdom and love in those who trust Him.

We cannot fail to notice that in today's Gospel reading Christ reveals to us the way in which God chose to be present in our world. Where two or three are gathered in His name, there He is in our midst. It is precisely this union of us in His name that God expects from us, and when it happens, He unfailingly comes to us. For if two of us agree to ask God for something together, He cannot fail to be present, because it was precisely for such agreement and union that He created us. The reverse is also true: for us to find ourselves in God's presence and come to Him, we must agree with one another. This means that what becomes significant for us is not our personal problems, but another person and that person's life. And this is an essential aspect of our likeness to God.

John the Baptist died because he condemned Herod Antipas's second marriage. Perhaps the Pharisees ask Jesus this question in order to provoke Him into saying something that would likewise anger the tetrarch. At that time, divorce in Jewish families generally took place at the man's initiative; opposite cases were extremely rare and required special circumstances. If a man was unfaithful, it was considered that he sinned against the other man with whose wife he had sinned. Jesus, however, speaks of faithfulness to one's own wife, thus establishing equality between man and woman in marriage, and this was new. But there is more. The Lord returns us to His original design for us. He joins us in love for one another so that no one may separate us again. For whoever has not learned faithfulness to one person cannot know faithfulness to the one God. This is why, in biblical symbolism—as can be seen especially clearly, for example, in the Revelation of John the Theologian—sexual immorality is often a symbol of paganism.

Let us decide seriously for ourselves whether we trust Jesus and the words He speaks. Because if we do, then we must draw quite definite conclusions from today’s Gospel passage:

• first, one should enter marriage intending it to last forever, rather than thinking, “If I do not like it, I will divorce”;
• second, marriage is God’s work, and its strength is determined by our trust in Him;
• third, adultery is the death of a marriage;
• fourth, remarriage after divorce is impossible;
• fifth, monasticism (more precisely, celibacy) is possible only through a special calling from God, not as a means of solving one’s problems in relationships with the opposite sex;
• sixth, all of this, of course, applies to those who consider themselves Christians and must not be used by us to condemn everyone we see around us!

The disciples’ horror is understandable: if it is so difficult for a rich person to be saved, what can be said of the poor, who often have no opportunity to fulfill the precepts of the Law? Christ confirms their intuitive realization: salvation—that is, passing into a new life with God and being delivered from hatred and unbelief—is altogether impossible. It is impossible for human beings; God alone can accomplish it. Those closest to salvation, therefore, are those who do not suppose from the outset that they are capable of drawing near to God by their own power. The young man, who had kept the chief commandments since childhood, was clearly a very good person. Yet his wealth—not money, but confidence in his ability to “be perfect”—leads him away from the Gospel message that “all things are possible with God.” He “goes away sorrowful,” thereby losing his “wealth of spirit” and gaining the possibility of entering the Kingdom together with the disciples, not by his own righteousness but through the almighty power of God’s love.

At the heart of the Gospel is the message of love. At the heart of love is forgiveness. The parable told by the Lord places forgiveness at the very center of human relationships. It is impossible to want to be forgiven while being unwilling to forgive. Forgiveness is a two-way bond between people, in which both sides are responsible for maintaining the relationship. To forgive not when a person has atoned for the wrong, and not even when that person has asked for forgiveness, but earlier, in advance, leaving no unforgiveness in one’s heart—this is the essence of Jesus’ words in verse 22.