NOTES for Rom 13:8-10

This approach to life and relationships can seem maximalist and therefore not very realistic, but only at first glance. In fact, the apostle's words are deeper than they appear at first, and therefore they are entirely realistic, provided, of course, that one looks at love not as emotions, dividing everyone around by the principle "like - dislike," "appealing - unappealing," but as relationships that do not depend on emotions or sympathies. In that case it becomes clear that relationships are precisely what condition everything else, everything included in the concept of the inner Torah. Indeed, the inner Torah is above all the aspirations, desires, and intentions that determine a person's spiritual life. These can either correspond to God's commandments, experienced by the person as an inner spiritual and moral imperative, or fail to correspond to them.

It is customary to think that physically we are what we eat, and psychically we are what we think and feel. Spiritually, however, we are what we desire and what we strive for. Jesus Himself says this briefly and simply: where your treasure is, there your heart is also. But desires, aspirations, and the intentions connected with them can exist in our heart in different ways.

They can be something self-sufficient, governing us and determining our attitude toward those around us and toward the world in general, while submitting to no one and nothing, including ourselves. Or they can be part of relationships and work to support and build them. In the first case, one can speak of love only in a certain sense and only up to a certain point, because often it is precisely our desires that destroy our relationships with other people when they become self-sufficient.

At times relationships can collapse because of the most ordinary and not very deep negative emotions, which take our will captive and force us to desire, or more precisely in this case not to desire, what in fact is important and dear to us but does not look that way when emotions gain the upper hand over us. In the second case, however, when relationships themselves are experienced by a person as true value, no emotions or desires in themselves become self-valued for him anymore. And then he can be at peace about keeping the commandments: with such an attitude toward one's neighbor, it is hard for a person to think of violating them, at least those that define his relationships with that very neighbor.

If you love, you no longer need to train yourself in polite words and polite smiles; you no longer need to restrain negative emotions toward another person: they simply are not there, and words and smiles arise on the tongue and on the face by themselves. Then following the inner Torah becomes completely natural and organic for a person. All the more if we are speaking of the love that unites the inhabitants of the Kingdom: here there is the fullness presupposed by the ideal of the living Torah, toward which in Gospel times every Christian strove as the goal of spiritual life, as that which would make him like Christ.

We are used to taking disorders in human relationships as a given, and if we are upset by them, it is often simply because they throw us off balance. But for the apostle, our quarreling and dark feelings toward a neighbor who has done something a little better than we have are things of the same order as feasting, drunkenness, and sensuality. This is exactly because both drunkenness and quarrels are the result of self-will, the result of our concerns for ourselves, both bodily and emotional, subordinating our striving for the good.

It is not for nothing that Paul, a little earlier, repeats Christ's words about the greatest commandment, which embraces all the others: to love your neighbor as yourself. After all, quarrels and envy, that is, sins against our neighbor, have their source in our lack of love both for our neighbor (and this is more or less obvious) and for ourselves (and this is no less important). This second part of the commandment is often not fully understood by us. Love is acceptance, and its foundation is self-acceptance, an adequate understanding of our abilities and their limits. To accept ourselves, it is very important to understand that we are not superhumans and never will be, that our abilities are not unlimited, and that we often take on too much and from exhaustion begin hurting our neighbors. Many quarrels can be avoided simply by acknowledging our tiredness and realizing that a constructive conversation should be put off until later. And our flesh often experiences many needs that require satisfaction. But for food not to turn into gluttony, it is important to understand ourselves and our needs well; it is important to understand that simple food is in fact enough for us. This is what Paul is talking about: "make no provision for the flesh, to gratify its desires."

And if we love ourselves as we are, accepting and recognizing our sins without turning repentance into self-torment, it will become much easier to love our neighbor. Because others are exactly the same as we are, just as imperfect. And God gives us only one means to cope with our human limitation: love.

One of the chief shortcomings of the law, and not only in the religious sphere, is that it is very extensive. In order not to break it, let alone fulfill it, one must know it well and constantly remember to observe it. And since the law contains God’s will for how we should live in this vast world, its scope is too great for weak human beings. Judging by the apostle Paul’s words, there is nothing surprising in this, because in the Creator’s design it was not the law that was meant to govern our life. Not the law, but the Lawgiver. It turns out that there is a perfectly understandable and reliable, though by no means simple, way to fulfill the law: to love one’s neighbor. This is precisely what the apostle Paul means when he writes to Christians that we live not under law but under grace, for love is a gift that God gives us freely and undeservedly.

And since love is the fulfillment of the law, its absence is a violation of the law, that is, sin. By its nature, sin is nothing other than a lack of love. This is important because it gives us a practical way to determine whether our actions are sinful or not.