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NOTES for Job 10:15

15 If I be wicked, woe unto me; and if I be righteous, yet will I not lift up my head. I am full of confusion; therefore see thou mine affliction;
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One could say that Job is challenging God, reproaching Him for what has happened to him. But in Job's words this time one can also see reverence before the Creator's greatness, submission before His will, and a humble readiness to accept His decisions. Job is not only ready to accept punishment for sins; he also refuses to insist on his genuine merits: even if I am right, I dare not lift up my head. But he wants to know why these disasters have fallen on him, why his former world, so clear and familiar, has collapsed.

When the familiar order collapses, and a way of life that seemed unshakable and the only possible one passes into the past, millions of people amid the ruins ask themselves and others the same questions, or similar ones, that Job asks. But even when an explanation is possible and understandable, it cannot always be heard at the moment when one is living through the consequences of catastrophe, when not every sufferer has the strength to receive the answer. It is not out of the question that the Lord does not always answer directly because He spares us: another heart might be crushed by His answer.

But even in His apparent silence He is near to those who suffer and does not abandon them.

Other notes

 
For Job 10:1-22
My soul is weary of my life; I will leave my complaint upon myself; I will speak in the bitterness of my soul.
I will say unto God, Do not condemn me; shew me wherefore thou contendest with me.
Is it good unto thee that thou shouldest oppress, that thou shouldest despise the work of thine hands, and shine upon the counsel of the wicked?
Hast thou eyes of flesh? or seest thou as man seeth?
Are thy days as the days of man? are thy years as man's days,
That thou inquirest after mine iniquity, and searchest after my sin?
Thou knowest that I am not wicked; and there is none that can deliver out of thine hand.
Thine hands have made me and fashioned me together round about; yet thou dost destroy me.
Remember, I beseech thee, that thou hast made me as the clay; and wilt thou bring me into dust again?
10 Hast thou not poured me out as milk, and curdled me like cheese?
11 Thou hast clothed me with skin and flesh, and hast fenced me with bones and sinews.
12 Thou hast granted me life and favour, and thy visitation hath preserved my spirit.
13 And these things hast thou hid in thine heart: I know that this is with thee.
14 If I sin, then thou markest me, and thou wilt not acquit me from mine iniquity.
15 If I be wicked, woe unto me; and if I be righteous, yet will I not lift up my head. I am full of confusion; therefore see thou mine affliction;
16 For it increaseth. Thou huntest me as a fierce lion: and again thou shewest thyself marvellous upon me.
17 Thou renewest thy witnesses against me, and increasest thine indignation upon me; changes and war are against me.
18 Wherefore then hast thou brought me forth out of the womb? Oh that I had given up the ghost, and no eye had seen me!
19 I should have been as though I had not been; I should have been carried from the womb to the grave.
20 Are not my days few? cease then, and let me alone, that I may take comfort a little,
21 Before I go whence I shall not return, even to the land of darkness and the shadow of death;
22 A land of darkness, as darkness itself; and of the shadow of death, without any order, and where the light is as darkness.
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Understanding that he has nothing left to lose, Job turns to God with a lengthy speech...  Read more

Understanding that he has nothing left to lose, Job turns to God with a lengthy speech (v. 1). He says to God: why are You against me (v. 2)? After all, You are not a human being; You cannot be bribed. So why do the wicked turn out to be more successful than the righteous in Your world (vv. 3-4)? But Job's main question is different. He says to God: You know me and You know my righteousness, so what do You want from me? Why are You searching out sins in me (vv. 5-7)? Obviously Job, like his friends, understands very well that there are no sinless people in the world, and that righteousness means not sinlessness, but faithfulness to God, who of course can always find some sin in the person who follows Him and remains faithful to Him, some sin of which the righteous person can be accused.

But this kind of digging through another person's sins in order to find grounds for accusation is characteristic of a human being, and specifically of a wicked human being, but certainly not of God! You Yourself, Job says as he addresses God, made me what I am, and You preserved me (vv. 8-12). Of course Job understands very well that this gives him no right to sin and wickedness (vv. 13-14), for God does not make a person a sinner. But in Job's case this is not about a trial, for any trial presupposes an objective and unbiased examination of the substance of the charges brought against the accused. Meanwhile, Job does not really see any trial at all; from God's side he sees only punishment without trial. He says of himself: if I am guilty, woe to me! But even if I am not, that does not make it any easier (vv. 15-16). There is no trial, no arguments in favor of the accused are accepted, and the witnesses for the prosecution become more and more numerous (v. 17).

Of course, to religious consciousness God often appears not so much as a just judge as an unmerciful one. But Job wants to reach the God of revelation, and therefore he says to God: if this is so, then why was I born into the world at all? Why have I lived my life (vv. 18-19)? Even so, Job says, it is still not too late, for death is near (vv. 20-22). At first glance, we seem to have before us the same laments with which Job's first speech begins. But in this case he is speaking of something deeper and more important: Job is trying to reach the God of revelation by reminding Him of meaning, in this case the meaning of his own life, as well as the meaning of every human life in general.

Indeed, if God has no concern for a person, if He is not going to be merciful toward him, then why is a person needed on earth at all? Human life could have some meaning only if God were not simply a force indifferent to a person, but precisely a just Judge, ready to receive a person, even after the severest examination and the strictest assessment. But if God is ready simply to step over a person, whether sinner or righteous, human life loses every meaning, and Job understands this. He understands that life has meaning only before the God of revelation, not before the God of religion. And that is why he so wants to see God face to face, because then and only then will he be able to receive an answer to the question that torments him: who, after all, is his God?

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